A Chinese Wedding in Malaysia

Discover the preparations and traditional rituals involved.

Normally, we would only attend the Chinese wedding dinner. Have you ever wondered about the sequences of events or traditional wedding customs that take place prior to the wedding day?

Now, let me give you a quick preview of the Chinese wedding preparations which starts as early as 1 or 2 years in advance.

chinese_wedding A bride wearing traditional wedding dresss (Kua).

In the modern days, couples would normally go to the marriage registrar to officially or getting engaged.

However, in the eyes of the parents and the society, they are not deemed as married as they have not gone through the traditional marriage ceremony!

Or should I say they have not announced their marriage by performing the traditional Chinese Marriage customs and holding a wedding banquet!

It is a norm for the couple to be officially married for one or two years prior from their wedding ceremony as there’s a lot of preparations involved.

A typical marriage registration ceremony for the Chinese is a very small or private affair. It is normally held in the marriage registrar office; Chinese Temples or Clan Associations. Click here to read about my brother’s marriage registration ceremony.

In the modern day, when the couples decided to get “married”, they will inform their respective parents of their intention.

First and foremost, the parents of the groom will consult the astrologer or fortune teller to choose the auspicious date for the wedding day. The auspicious marriage date and others important marriage ritual dates are chosen based on the couple’s Ba Zhi (date of birth and time). Click here to read about the Chinese marriage astrologer and choosing auspicious wedding date.

Next, the parents of the groom will pay the future-in-law a visit to ask for their daughter’s hand in marriage ( 提亲). This ceremony is very similar to the Malay community tradition called “merisik.” During this visit, both the parents will discuss or negotiate on the details of the gifts for the Betrothal Ceremony.

Chinese_Dowry Some of the wedding dowry

Then, within one month or two weeks prior to the wedding day, another Chinese wedding customs called the "Gua Da Li" （过大礼）or betrothal ceremony is performed.

An elderly couple from the groom’s side will be the representative for sending the betrothal gifts including the wedding dowry to the bride’s parents. A Chinese wedding dinner or banquet is held at night or during the day.

Alternatively, the bride and groom might opt to hold the wedding banquet during the wedding day (Combining the wedding banquet for both sides). Click her to read about my brother’s betrothal ceremony in detail.

Note: Traditionally it is a customs for the Chinese to hold separate wedding banquets.

Another notable or important event is the installation/fixing of the marriage bed ceremony or “An Chuang” （安床）. The date of this ritual has been carefully selected by the astrologer earlier. Click here to read about the importance of the marriage bed and this traditional ceremony.

Note: The bridal room is located at the groom’s house.

Then, comes the bachelor night; the night prior to the wedding day or the last day the groom celebrates his single status. Click here to read how the bachelor night is celebrated in Malaysia.

The next day….

WEDDING DAY

Chinese_Wedding_Day The groom feeding his wife glutinous rice ball

Preparations starts as early 6.00 a.m in the morning and much earlier at the bride’s house….

Sometimes as early as five in the morning for makeup and hair styling!

The groom and his team (brothers) will leave his house to go and fetch his wife.

It’s not a simple task as the groom and his brothers(friends) will have to face the obstacles prepared by the bride’s team (sisters- which consists of females friends and relatives) before he could take his bride home.

Later, there’s tea ceremony, prayers (to the deities and ancestral) were held at the bride’s house.

Yup, it’s fun to play the groom and his brothers. However, they need to make sure that they (bride and groom) need to be back at the groom house before the auspicious time is over ( pre-determine earlier by the astrologer).

At the groom house, another tea ceremony, prayers and wedding customs is held similar to the bride’s home.

After the ceremony of the marriage day, the wedding banquet (either lunch or dinner) will be held where all guests, relatives and friends are sited in the restaurants and enjoy their meals.

Delicious 8 courses meal, wedding toast and Yum Seng!

That's pretty much how the chinese wedding is done in Malacca or Malaysia.